Negotiation and Conflict Management: Laying the Groundwork

Objective

Building positive relationships with negotiation partners helps pave the way for better outcomes. 

Goals

• Reflect on how you approach negotiations
• Make effective small talk
• Build rapport and trust, and manage the impression you make
• Use active listening to understand the other person better 

• Our mental models are an internal representation of how we interpret and respond to the world
• You don’t have to like negotiating, but you’ll need to do it regularly - getting comfortable with handling conflict is important 
• Mindfulness and meditation can help reduce your stress levels before a  negotiation - visit mindful.org for more information and to learn how to meditate
• Taking a collaborative approach, where the needs of both parties are met, builds positive relationships and improves outcomes
• Being too aggressive, and concerned only with your needs at the bargaining table, can foster mistrust between the parties

• Self-monitor - know how you are being perceived by others - and be likeable and friendly
• Keep your self-disclosures superficial
• If you lack confidence, devise a script and stick to it
• Offer authentic sounding praise and compliments - but don’t over do it
• Build conversation around ‘props’ e.g. photos, personal items in the other person’s environment
• “Be yourself” - but only as appropriate! It’s important to manage the impression you make
• Don’t get to business talk too quickly 
• Avoid voicing divisive opinions - e.g. airing political views
• Don’t overshare or be overly familiar
• Stop yourself being too serious - be playful and stick to light chit-chat

• Avoid being individualistic – to create meaningful rapport, give equal consideration to the other person 
• Questioning – use effective, open questions to uncover insights
• Respect – if you show respect to the other person, they’ll reciprocate
• Perception – what you say and do influences the other person’s impression of you
• Empathy – see things through the other person’s eyes
• Intangible value – people care about intangible value – e.g mutual respect, positive relationships - just as much as outcomes

• Ask relevant questions – encourage the speaker to elaborate by asking open-ended questions 
• Paraphrase and reflect back – summarise and reflect back what the speaker has said to show you’re listening and understand
• Suspend judgment – remain open, without forming an opinion
• Validate the emotions – name and validate the other person’s feelings, even if you don’t agree with them